Good Christian Fun

Good Christian Fun  

What bonds people the most? In my humble opinion I would say shared trauma. Which leads us right to the point of today. Work and family life. Ok that was kind of a joke I didn't think that just because your mom asks you to and your siblings to clean up around the house you and your siblings have shared trauma. But I do think that working with your siblings can bond you together. Some of my best memories with my sisters is being on our hands and knees scrubbing the Kitchen floor and pretended we were Cinderella. Then teasing each other about who is Cinderella and the step sisters. You probably have some similar memories with your family too.  

Its interesting how so much of human technology has been formed so that we don’t have to work so hard. But hard work is what can bring us together. I spent so many summer on my family's farm working with my siblings. At first, I thought it was the worst job in the world. I had to wake up earlier than I did for school, the days were long, and the jobs were very hard. The only thing that that day went by was working with my brother and sister. It was small moments like carrying the heaviest pipe across fields and driving old tractors in the heat that created a deeper connection between me and my siblings. At the end of my first summer, I was excited to start school because that meant no more moving pipes, but I was also sad because I wouldn’t spend as much time with my family.  

When we think back on house work with family it almost always includes working along side your family and not going solo. Also, when we know that what we are working towards is important, it gives a sense of responsibility and a feeling that what we are doing matters. Children need to feel that the actions they take while they are working are making a difference and that they can be a part of that difference. We teach our children how to be more independent as we show them and then work alongside them, letting them take part in hard work themselves. It's like planting a garden. First, kids would rather do than weed the first thing in the morning. But then in the fall when they reap the rewards of eating the vegetables that they grew they can let themselves feel the pride of hard work.

  

Whenever I think about negative memories of work around the house or farm its always when I was alone. Nothing is as fun as you have to do it yourself and resent it more when you're the only one that's suffering. I remember washing walls with my sister as kids and we couldn’t stop fighting or whining to each other. Finally, my mom was so sick of us that she put us in separate rooms to clean. At first, I was glad because my sister had gotten on my nerves so much but then I missed her. Washing the walls sucked even more when you were the only one doing it. 

Some parents want to leave the cleaning to themselves, or they get so tired of harping on their kids to get something done so they just do it themselves. I think we rob our children of learning and rob ourselves of bonding with them when we do this. Sometimes I think we should skip the dishwasher and wash them by hand with our children. Talk to them, listen and let the shared trauma of doing hard work together bond you.